We Are The Champions

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The SEVEN
by Mack Williams
24 September 2015

I. Summerslam, Pt. 1

The officer responsible for this – who needs to be fired for this along with the four other cases in which he has been charged with questionable conduct – is now on desk duty with gun taken away pending investigation. If only Eric Garner had been a professional tennis player like James Blake.

II. King James Version

No matter what LeBron James does during the rest of his career, he is a champion for life as a result of his plan to finance the college education of thousands of Cleveland-area residents. The effect of this will continue to be felt long after King James has hung up his sneakers.

As for potential current championships, I believe the Cavs need to pay Tristan Thompson. I’m still trying to figure out why he went from lefty to righty shooter, but that said, on another team his various shortcomings would be magnified, and his strengths minimized; on Cleveland, it’s the other way around.

III. Summerslam, Pt. 2

With the calendar having moved into fall, we can now officially say that this was an extremely tough summer to be a WWE legend…Dusty Rhodes – dead; Roddy Piper – dead; Jimmy Snuka – charged with murder.

IV. Baddest Woman on the Planet, Pt. 1

Ronda Rousey was right – she cannot beat Floyd Mayweather in a boxing match…nor could he beat her in an MMA contest. But as to being able to beat anyone in the world in a fight…she may be drinking some of her own Kool-Aid.

V. Baddest Woman on the Planet, Pt. 2

Like many people, I am at a “live and let live” place in life. Assuming there’s no negative effect on either my life or those whom I love and care about, I don’t care in the least what someone else does or how they identify themselves. So I lose no sleep whatsoever over Bruce Jenner transitioning to Caitlyn. I almost lost sleep, however, over some comments calling Caitlyn beautiful and describing Serena Williams as looking like a man. Haters will hate.

VI. Made For Each Other

Donald Trump and FOX News have been going back and forth at each other since the first GOP presidential debate, after which the Donald complained about being ambushed by FOX and Megyn Kelly (in which he may have had a bit of a point), and followed that up with his comment which seemed to reference Ms. Kelly’s menstrual cycle. But no matter what they each say, they are made for each other; FOX loves the eyeballs it gets when he is on, and Trump loves the spotlight on the leading conservative network. So they will always make their way back to each other’s good graces.

As for Kelly, the following quote regarding Black Santa Clauses can just sit in the air…

“Jesus was a white man, too. It’s like we have, he’s a historical figure that’s a verifiable fact, as is Santa, I just want kids to know that.”

VII. Who Would Win?

Obviously no one knows, and no one will ever know, who would win a decade-oriented dream team championship as depicted in the above photo, and any effort to resolve the question in discussion could create a night-long debate between people who would say:

With 11 titles in 13 years, Bill Russell is the greatest defensive player ever and the greatest champion in team sports history. Wilt – who averaged 50 points a game in 1962 – is the most dominant athlete in NBA history. West, Big O, and Baylor are the gold standard at their respective positions. The 60’s would win.

Or:

There has never been a center as fluid as Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Dr. J revolutionized the small forward position, Pistol Pete was a ball handler like few others and Clyde was one of the greatest defensive guards and big game players ever. The 70’s would win.

Or:

Moses Malone was unstoppable because of his relentless nature, Isiah Thomas was the greatest 6 foot and under player of all time, and Magic and Bird are the greatest leaders and facilitators ever. The 80’s would win.

Or:

Everyone wants to be like Mike, ’cause he’s the greatest player ever. Stockton’s the greatest PG ever, Malone’s the greatest PF ever, and Hakeem’s Dream Shake was the best center move ever. The 90’s would win.

Or:

Shaq is the most physically dominant player ever, Tim Duncan is the best power forward ever, LeBron is the greatest athlete in the history of the league, Kobe is the second-best guard ever, and Iverson is the toughest and most hard-nosed- not to mention talented – small man ever. The 00’s would win.

Or:

Steph Curry is the greatest shooter ever, Russell Westbrook is the most athletic two-guard of all time, KD has the best touch of any 6’11 plus player in history, James Harden is a beast, and sky’s the limit for Anthony Davis. The 10’s would win.

I could theoretically go with any of the above, but if I have to pick one, I’ll go with…the 80’s. I have always maintained that in choosing among greats, I would pick Magic first, and would not care who my opponents are, for Magic and his playmaking skills will enable him to come out on top. Adding Bird to his team would be the icing on the cake. I would add that as great as Kevin McHale was, I would be that much more bullish on the 80’s team with Bernard King.

In the same vein…I’d feel much better about the 70’s team if you take the Sixers jersey off of Julius Erving and replace it with a Nets #32 jersey. If you don’t know about ABA Dr. J, you probably never will, but suffice it to say that the NBA version of Dr. J was a Hall of Famer, but the ABA version was sooooo much better!

And…I might have had to take the 90’s team, Magic/Bird notwithstanding, if they had Scottie Pippen. I love Charles Barkley on my favorite show, Inside the NBA, but I might have to replace him here.

As for the 00’s, I loved being in the building in Philly one night The Answer scored 50, but with those other four players around being constantly double-teamed, I might have had to take this team if Reggie Miller were there in his place.

And finally…Harden is a beast, but I might want Kawhi Leonard out there in the 10’s. Anyway, hit me up with your opinions!

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