Sweet Home Alabama

The SEVEN
by Mack Williams
12 December 2017

I. The Late Bob Smith

Although I am somewhat familiar with running late on occasion, I was definitely on time this morning when I sat down on the commuter train… which I will not name…across from a gentleman that I will refer to as Bob Smith.

Out of the corner of my eye I notice Bob pulling some Vaseline on his hands and forearms. No biggie. Then – again out of the corner of my eye – I see a spray bottle of cologne, which he went on to use. I know that because I could smell it thereafter. Next came the airport-sized container of deodorant, which Smith proceeded to use, following that by pulling off his shoes so that he could put on these actually very nice looking socks.  Wish I had taken a picture on the DL.

Does this train not have a bathroom?

II. Need A QB?

Now that the Philadelphia Eagles’ MVP-candidate Carson Wentz is out for the season with a torn ACL, we have gotten to the place that I anticipated where a Super Bowl contender has a need for a quarterback. How about Colin Kaepernick…a guy that has taken a team to the Super Bowl?

III. Just To Recap

The polls have closed in the AL Senate election, where the contest was between Doug Jones, the guy that prosecuted the killers of the four Sunday School girls in Birmingham, and a guy that is alleged to have preyed on young girls like that. It’s between a guy that attempted to right wrongs committed against Blacks, and another who has stated that America was great during slavery.

And the Republicans are backing who?

IV. Moral Bankruptcy or Recap, Pt. 2

What’s up with this, Republicans?
Bill Cosby: Take his show off the air
Matt Lauer: Take him off the air
John Conyers: He needs to resign
Al Franken: He needs to resign
Roy Moore: Put him in the Senate

And what about Donald Trump? The Republican Party is truly morally bankrupt, bankrupt being a most appropriate term to use when describing a party led by Donald J. Trump. Here’s hoping that the people of Alabama have moved forward and have done the right thing.

V. Congratulations!

I grew up in a National League house, meaning that in New York my folks gravitated to the Brooklyn Dodgers due to their signing of Jackie Robinson, while other African-Americans liked the New York Giants and their future hall of Famers Willie Mays and Monte Irvin. Once those teams moved west, fans like my dad kept a soft spot in their hearts for them for the rest of their lives, and I was trained to root for the National League team in the World Series. So I was not rooting for the Houston Astros in the Series this year, but how can you dislike a team with Jose Altuve?

They may not need to do a reorder of the champagne and sparkling cider in Houston, however, as a result of the Yankees acquisition of Giancarlo Stanton to go along with Aaron Judge and Co.

VI. Five Time Champion

The wrestler Booker T used to brag about being a “five time, Five Time champion,” a phrase which could also describe one of the greatest coaches in the history of pro sports, Gregg Popovich of the San Antonio Spurs. I would love to see the discussion that ensues regarding White House invitations if he were to become a “six-time, Six Time” champion in June, especially after these comments to Dave Zirin of The Nation:

“I’ve been amazed and disappointed by so much of what this President had said, and his approach to running this country, which seems to be one of just a never ending divisiveness. But his comments…about those who have lost loved ones in times of war and his lies that previous presidents Obama and Bush never contacted their families, is so beyond the pale, I almost don’t have the words.

This man in the Oval Office is a soulless coward who thinks that he can only become large by belittling others. This has of course been a common practice of his, but to do it in this manner–and to lie about how previous Presidents responded to the deaths of soldiers–is as low as it gets. We have a pathological liar in the White House: unfit intellectually, emotionally, and psychologically to hold this office and the whole world knows it, especially those around him every day. The people who work with this President should be ashamed because they know it better than anyone just how unfit he is, and yet they choose to do nothing about it. This is their shame most of all.”

If not Biden…

VII. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

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One thought on “Sweet Home Alabama

  1. Good piece. The Late Bob Smith made me literally laugh out loud. That is a typical day in my commuter life. Gregg Popovich is on point.

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